S!P!A!R!K!

from the Macalester Public Knowledge Base

Fall of 2005 marks the beginning of the first full school year that S!P!A!R!K!â„¢ will be in existence, and boy, are we excited!! Finally, a club that recognizes the needs of students at Macalester that have long been overlooked. In the last year, smoking has been attacked by not only the Macalester administration in the form of an attempt to ban the use of tobacco products near the entrances of buildings (which amounts to cruel and unusual punishment when one considers the ferocity of Minnesota winters), but also by the city of Minneapolis, where the right to choose to smoke inside many privately owned establishments has been taken away. Fueled by these injustices, S!P!A!R!K!â„¢ has risen to create a niche for all of those who feel shunned and discriminated against! For all those who wish to enjoy fine tobacco products without a feeling of overwhelming guilt!

There is a lot on the agenda for the upcoming year. S!P!A!R!K!™ will be a household (dormhold, if you will) name by the end of the scholastic year. We will be agitating for both a cigarette vending machine (which will, according to our club's values, only vend all-natural and non-corporate cigarettes), and for a "smoking hut," a haven in which Macalester students can congregate to enjoy tobacco during the cold winter months. Because S!P!A!R!K!™ recognizes the unscrupulous practices of larger tobacco companies, the club will be working to help its members find alternative means of enjoying tobacco. For example, we will be holding sessions to teach our young ¡SPARX!™ to roll their own cigarettes.

Those of you who've liked what you've heard should contact S!P!A!R!K!â„¢ (it's easy, try The Grate). Welcome to Fall 2005, tobacco is on the march!

Signed: S!P!A!R!K!â„¢ "That which does not kill us, only makes us stronger!"â„¢